A quaint little drinking couple with a camping problem!

Friday, September 3, 2010

The Tailgate Practice!

Hello and how is everyone doing today.  Miss Moe and I just love this cooler, and much less humid, weather.  Moe likes it because she can be outside and see what is going on in the campground.  I like is because the big guy is outside which leaves me in charge of the house.  Life just doesn't get any better than this.

I would imagine you are anxiously awaiting the results of the TAILGATE PRACTICE.  It is a good thing it was scheduled because it sure was needed.  I didn't know adults (?) could get so out of shape.  The practice was held near a small pond off Trail Bend Dr. in the rural Swisher, IA neighborhood where Ed and Carol Hawkins live.  Normally a practice would be held on the same playing field as the actual game but nobody thought the good people of the First Mennonite Church in Iowa City (or the local police officers) would appreciate this informal workout.  The workout was attended by Ed and Carol, Les and Sherry Minor, Mike and Kathi Benner, Brian and Sue Aubrecht, Ken and Jean Frauenholz, Lavon and Nancy Rutt, and, of course, the Happy Couple, along with Moe and me.  The idea behind the Tailgate Practice was to make sure the right amount of snacks were available and prepared correctly, the fire pit was lit properly and the wood was burning brightly, the charcoal was brought to the proper temperature before cooking, the brats and burgers were prepared and cooked correctly, the football was tossed at the correct distance with the right amount of spin, the bloody marys were made correctly, and the proper amount of beer was available and served at the proper temperature.  All of this plus to assure no tall tails were told, no dirt storys came from the lips of the first team, and no one got out of line.  The results you ask.  The practice was a success because if this group had gone into the first game in the shape they were in, the season may have been a complete failure.

The Happy Couple's day started when Dave went to work and Shari left Mount Pleasant at 8:30 AM to drive to Saddleback Golf Course near Solon to play golf in the annual classic, locally known as the Lady Jane Invitational.  Upon arriving at the course at 10:00 AM Shari promptly joined the other contestants in a fast round of Bloody Marys.  Then it was off to the golf course.  In the mean time, Dave is still working.  Shari had a successful day on the course as her team (Ex-neighbor Jan, sister-in-law Peg, and friend Becky) tied for first place and Shari won a new car.  While Shari was playing golf, Dave was back in Mount Pleasant finishing work, preparing food for the evening, packing coolers, loading the pickup, putting Moe and me into said pickup, and driving to Swisher. After golf the participants of the Lady Jane Invitational sat in the clubhouse and had a round or two of adult beverages.  Meanwhile Dave was still preparing for Tailgate Practice.

Tailgate Practice started promptly at 6:00 PM with all participates arriving on time.  But things went downhill in a hurry.  Oh, the fire pit was burning brightly, the beer was the correct temperature, and Dave had the baked beans cooked on time. (Have you ever tried to cook beans on a grill?  Stupid cooks them on the grate where normal people would put them in a pan and then put the pan on the grate.  Oh well.)   Anyway, as I was saying, things did not go as planned.  Shortly after everyone arrived it started flowing.  The adult beverages and the bull s---.  And as the amount of beverages increased, the stories got to be taller.  Finally Moe and I had to put on our boots.  It was just getting too deep.  The pond even started to flow over the dam.  The group had way too many, but delicious, snack,  The beer was served at proper temperature but, again, way too much.  The charcoal was lit but the person in charge forgot about the coals and let them get burn down quite low before starting to cook the brats and burgers.  Bloody Marys were not served, and the football never made it out of the car.  About 9:30 everyone wisely decided enough was enough and went their merry ways.  Fortunately for Moe, Shari, and I, we stayed at Ed and Carol's as did Mike and Kathi.  Upon arriving at the Hawkins mansion, Ed, Mike, and Stupid decided one last thing was missing.  That is when the schnapps bottle came out.  Folks, it wasn't pretty.  The next morning it was unanimous that some amongst the group may have been over served.  Therefore, I consider the Tailgate Practice a huge success.  All concerned now know moderation is best.  That is why you have things like Tailgate Practice.  To learn your limits and stick to them.  The Tailgaters won't remember it next time, but at least they knew it on Saturday morning.

While I was sitting here writing this, I just saw where Zach Johnson is tied for first in a golf tournament.  That a way Zach.  Beat poor old Tiger.

Things are really happening in Mount Pleasant this week.  Old Threshers Reunion is going on and the town is full.  So is the campground.  The brain surgeon has been putting in a lot of hours which means more money for dog food for Moe and more peace and quite for Shari and I as he is out of the house.  You got to love it. Unfortunately, things will be back to normal next Tuesday.  Speaking of back to normal, I see where the Cubs and Dodgers are doing their normal end of the year charge.  Charge towards last place that is.  The Happy Couple aren't to happy about that situation.  Oh well, wait till next year.

Dave and Shari are all ready for Hawkeye football.  They got their flag out on the side of the house and have their best Hawkeye apparel ready.  They don't go to games anymore.  They have decided it is just to expensive and too much of a hassle.  They just stay home and watch the games on the big screen.  I think they are just getting old but don't tell them I said that. 

I guess this will do for the Tailgate Practice update.  I know you thought it was strange when I mentioned it last time but now you see why it was dearly needed.  This may get to be an annual thing.  Who knows.

As the Happy Couple always say "Wine a bit.  You'll feel better."

As always,